well i actually am.. in the morning, but going towards the end of it, it went sour.
i dont understand why ppl are still so worked up about little problems and make it as though the world is going to end.
that includes me of course. im still struggling so much to free myself from being paranoid, judgemental, and all those shitty stuffs.
anger management. yeap, i suck at that department too. hell, i suck at most of it. because of what? because i choose to live in a fairytale.
i live on stories that i made up in my mind. i'd create all these fictional characters and dialogues which i only choose to hear and understand. i'd reject whatever hurts me. i'd reject whatever that is negative. i'd reject sadness. i'd reject hardship.
basically, i reject reality.
but somehow, i find all these petty things, kinda fuel me up for life. its what keeping me going. u know, like, how working gets you money, how taking a dump gives you relieve, how 9gag makes you feel good.
im praying so hard that people will realize how fortunate they really are, when compared to others. it just kills me inside knowing that ppl take for granted what they already have, the extent of freedom they get to enjoy,and the experience that they are so fortunate to gain which others are dying just to have a hint of it.
because some people, like me, can only bask in the happiness of others. how to say, erm, mengemis kebahagiaan org lain?
but still, i will always be an optimist, and try to reduce the whining and complaining. Happy ending is not for everyone. if it was, grateful is a virtue, which will cease to exist.
so ppl be happy with what you have. be happy with who you're with. be happy with all your loss and gains.
just be happy.
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